Kristy Arbon's HeartWorks

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The Gift of Fearlessness through Stillness and Somatic Self-Compassion

November 8, 2017 by Kristy Arbon

Photo by Scott Webb on Unsplash

“Within you there is a stillness and a sanctuary to which you can retreat any time.”
~ Hermann Hesse ~

Every morning I wake with the uneasiness of cortisol coursing through me and layering thoughts about what I need to achieve in the day ahead. It’s not my fault – it’s just how my brain is wired, and I know that many of you have a similar experience. And so I have developed a ritual of practicing Stillness and Somatic Self-Compassion as a way to ease my morning experience. Rather than get out of bed annoyed and wired with cortisol and stress, I give myself the gift of fearlessness and tend to myself first.Here’s a Stillness practice I do while laying in bed:

  • I remember to notice that my mind is busy and that it’s causing me stress (remembering can be the most elusive part about informal practice);
  • I bring my awareness to the fact that I have a choice about how I tend to that busyness;
  • I bring in some perspective and remind myself that my thoughts are not facts;
  • I remind myself of my intention to be kind to myself;
  • I bring awareness to my body, who is always in the present moment (!);
  • I allow myself to linger with the awareness of a body at rest;
  • when my attention moves back to my mind which starts to get busy again, I move my awareness back to the stillness in my body;
  • I savor the experience of being immersed in stillness.
Often I add in Somatic Self-Compassion practice:
  • Notice that my body is feeling unease either because of temperature, uncomfortable posture, or lack of feeling nurtured;
  • Bring in an attitude of kindness and self-care for myself;
  • Ask my body what it needs in the moment – movement to a different posture, more or less bed coverings, to use the restroom or have some water.
  • If there is unease in my mind, I move to a posture that nurtures me using the affiliative system:
  • I snuggle into fluffy bedsheets,
  • I roll onto my side and hug a body pillow,
  • I tuck my head in and bury the side of my face in a pillow,
  • I hold something fluffy and warm in my hands,
  • I rub my limbs against my bedsheets as a way to self-soothe,
  • I rub my skin with my hand to self-soothe,
  • I hold myself in an embrace.
Stillness and Somatic Self-Compassion practices together are a beautiful way to nurture the body and to give the mind a rest. Exploring Stillness Practices is one part of the upcoming Finding Your Practice Path online course. If you’d like to explore a plethora of self-compassion practices with me, I’d love to see you there!
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About Kristy Arbon

Founder of HeartWorks, creatrix of Somatic Self-Compassion and developer of Live Online Mindful Self-Compassion for the Center for Mindful Self-Compassion, Kristy Arbon is an Australian living and loving in the US. After discovering the deep healing power of emergent self-wisdom and self-compassion in her own life, Kristy felt called to share these practices and trainings with others. She's since made it her life's work. "I teach so that I can learn, and I learn so that I can teach.”

Author's website
  • Lovingkindness for Ourselves (13 minutes) - November 17, 2021
  • Lovingkindness for a Loved One (19 minutes) - November 10, 2021
  • Soothing Touch and Self-Compassion Break (24 minutes) - November 3, 2021
  • Affectionate Breathing (18 minutes) - October 27, 2021
  • Arriving Meditation (9 minutes) - October 20, 2021
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